Kids can’t behave at the doctor’s office

My kids are getting much better about their public behavior.  I’m starting to think I can reenter polite society one of these days.  As much as they have improved, there is still one place I dread taking them- the doctor’s office.  For some reason in that tiny room their worst behavior comes out in front of the one person who has a ten minute window to evaluate how I’m doing at keeping them safe and healthy.  At our last visit while I was distracted talking to the doctor, my two year-old managed to sneak into my purse, find a forgotten bag of M&Ms from Easter and crawl under a chair to devour them.  Then there was the time while waiting in the room my kids managed to booby-trap the area in front of the door with Matchbox cars so the doctor nearly tripped when she walked in.  But nothing matches the humiliation of the time I had apparently over prepared my son for what might be required in his physical exam.  As soon as the first nurse walked in the room to get his height and weight he immediately dropped his pants.  When we were preparing to leave she said, “I’ve already told all the other nurses.  That was the funniest thing that’s happened here in a long time.”  It’s amazing how often my kids get that kind of reaction.

I wish I didn’t feel this need to present a perfect picture of my abilities as a parent.  I’m sure the doctor sees this level of crazy pretty regularly, but I really want her to think I know what I’m doing.

So is this the way I respond to the Lord?  I know He knows me- my faults and failings included- and yet I want to present this perfect picture to Him about how I’ve got it all together.  This becomes a roadblock to honest prayer and keeps me from seeking out accountability when I need it.  I take comfort in the words of Jesus that, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”  I want to be humble enough to acknowledge to The Great Physician exactly where I need help.