It’s okay to laugh. My life is kind of ridiculous. Follow along on Facebook or Twitter.
It’s slightly awkward when the AC repairman is trying to leave and the two year-old is shouting, “I going to miss him!” And is super awkward when the two year-old shouts, “I want to kiss him!” (No one in this family is allowed to leave the house without kissing the two year-old. Apparently this policy now also extends to anyone who comes over for any reason.)
In a fit of rage over not being allowed jellybeans for breakfast, the two year-old ripped off his shorts and undies. I’m putting this response on the list of Behaviors to be Sure We Eliminate Prior to Kindergarten.
#longlist
Step 1: Ask for appliance recommendation.
Step 2: When asked if you need gas or electric, respond with “it’s electric.”
Step 3: Have no idea what they recommend because in your head you’re singing, “Boogie woogie woogie.”
#electricslideisruiningme
The six month-old endured her shots with barely a whimper. But heaven help the person who has to wipe her runny nose.
A racerback one piece seems like a perfectly appropriate swimsuit for your four year-old. Until she comes out wearing it completely backwards. . .
Me: Joel, you need to tell your sister you’re sorry.
(He goes to hug her)
Me: You need to say it with your mouth.
(He goes to “hug” her with his mouth)
#notquite
Me: It’s your last day of first grade! *sniff sniff*
Josh: If it’s MY last day, why are YOU all sad?
Me: Um. . . no reason. . .
#growingupsofast #longsummerahead
Sign your child is a troublemaker: In every group picture, he is smiling a sneaky smile and the child next to him is crying.
Me: What do you think would be a good name for your new brother?
Bethany: Well, IF it’s a boy.
Me: Remember? Yesterday when you went with me to the doctor and we found out it IS a boy?
And then the tears start again.
#understandable #FOURbrothers
Me: What about ______? (baby name)
Husband: It sounds too white.
Me: Um, you are aware that I’m birthing a white baby, right?
#transracialfamilyproblems
Josh brought home his first grade writing portfolio. I did not know one child could write so many poems about Minecraft and Pokemon.
#boys
Less than a week into summer break and I have a child crying, “I hate summer! Why can’t it be school again?”
#agreed
Two year-old comes out of his room crying during his nap to tell me that his bear drop off his bed and he can’t reach it without getting out of bed, which he isn’t allowed to do during nap time.
#toddlerlogic
Some days you sit down in the rocker with a bottle and a burp rag for a couple minutes and then realize you’re forgetting something. The baby.
#oneofthosedays
I will likely never be waterboarded, but I have had a toddler “help” me drink a glass of water, so I feel like I have some level of empathy.
Before high-fiving the toddler for washing his hands, it is good to clarify WHERE he washed his hands.
#toiletwaterdoesntcount