We all have a point at which we get overwhelmed.  I tend to straddle the line between extrovert and introvert and sometimes if I look at a week that’s full of extrovert-type activities, I can start to feel exhausted.  I may even get physical symptoms as the week goes on- headaches or digestive issues- as I’m trying to deal with what feels stressful.  As adults, we’ve learned how to handle this kind of stress.  We look at our busy week and remind ourselves that we just have to take it one day at a time.  We need to focus on the task in front of us and not get too bogged down in worrying about what is still to come.

So try to remember how stressful that can feel to you the next time you ask your child to take on a big project.  While a week full of deadlines or meetings or visiting at the in-laws or teaching Vacation Bible School might feel overwhelming to you, to your child it might be something as simple as cleaning their room.  It’s good to start teaching them now about breaking down those big overwhelming projects into little tasks that feel more manageable.

If it’s time to clean their room, instead of sending them to their room with the instructions, “no snack until this room is clean”, stand at the door to their room and pick one goal that seems manageable.  When they’ve finished that, you give them the next goal, and so on.  This is going to require a lot more accountability (i.e. you checking to see that they’ve done each task), but you’re more likely to get a clean room at the end and not have a child sitting in a crying heap in the middle of the floor a half an hour later (and the room is still a mess).  By teaching them that each big task is made up of smaller tasks, you’re also giving them an important lifeskill that empowers them in other areas.  Instead of telling them, “Get dressed” (if this is a task that overwhelms them) just tell them, “Take off your pajamas and then come see me.”  When they get to you, they get a high-five.  Then it’s on to the next step of the getting dressed process.  We do this so that someday when they see they have a 20 page research paper to do they won’t panic.  That’s totally overwhelming, but sitting down to write an outline or brainstorm topics is pretty manageable.  We also don’t want to enable them or teach them they aren’t capable by doing tasks for them that they’re capable of doing themselves.

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